It was only weeks into my divorce when an IM popped up from a friend on my computer screen. I’d finally written as openly as I could on my blog about what was happening—why I’d moved into my parents’ house with my child, removed my husband’s name from Facebook, why I was no longer wearing a wedding ring. My friend’s words popped up on my screen.
“I’m not sure what happened,” she wrote. “But I want you to know I am on your ninja squad.”
Ninja squad? I hadn’t even realized I needed that. But I needed that. What I found was my circle of support was shifting quickly. People I believed were my rocks were questioning me, slipping away. Others surprised me by stepping in closer. Seeing the circle around me as ninjas—stealthy, smart, skilled, in sync—helped me to decide who I wanted to be at the ready when I was sparring or when I was silent.
Here are the people you need on your side when you’re a parent leaving a relationship: