For about a year, when my oldest daughter was a toddler, I hung out with a woman I really couldn't stand. She talked too much, always about herself, and any story I contributed to the conversation she made sure to top it. I hated how I felt after spending time with her and, yet, I kept at it. Why? Because I was lonely. And this woman? Well, she was available.
One of the challenges of becoming a mom is the fact that your social circles shift, especially if you've spent the previous years working and/or are the first in your cohort to have a baby. Also, you sort of want it to. It's nice knowing someone (or many someones) who is going through just what you're going through and at just about the same pace. And while the Internet and its countless mommy blogs and parenting Web sites are helpful, so is a a living, breathing person who drinks coffee.
But how? Meeting real-live new moms who have returned to work, like you (or who have chosen not to return to work, like you), moms who are in the throes of sleepless nights or breast-feeding troubles or who live in apartments as cramped as yours—where the hell are they? And once you find one, how do you keep her?
Your selfie can include your kid and a muffin top!
Just like it sounds, hooking up with other mothers is a bit like dating. You can hang out at bars, or, more productively, at parks, and hope to bump into one. Or you can join a playgroup—which is how I found the aforementioned barely tolerable but nonetheless breathing mom. Or, you can use the skills you honed on OKCupid over at Mom Meet Mom. Even better, your selfie can include your kid and a muffin top!
Launched just recently, Mom Meet Mom is free to use. Participants answer a questionnaire, which undergoes some algorithmic wizardry and spits out profiles of other moms local to you who have similar interests, schedules, families and personalities. Reach out to the ones who interest you. Ignore the ones who don't. The site also has a blog and nine forums, ranging in topics from motherhood to work/life to grief and loss, where you can post questions (and answers to questions) and, you know, make a move on other moms.
Brooke Siegel at Daily Candy says because Mom Meet Mom is relatively new, matches might be limited at first. But as a person who spent 12 months being lectured to by a peer in exchange for human contact and a place to be, even a bad match is a match and worth at least one afternoon, if not 50.