Baby

Going From 1 to 2 Kids Was Way Easier Than 0 to 1

by Janssen Bradshaw

Photograph by Twenty20

Before I had my first child, I had major blinders on regarding what motherhood was really all about. I heard it was going to be incredible, full of sleepless nights and everything in between. I was excited and felt ready for all of it.

However, my expectations and reality collided within the first few days. I even had a mini panic attack in the shower on day four. I went from a full-time working woman to a full-time stay-at-home mom, with a husband who worked a lot. I didn’t know what to do with myself. To be frank, motherhood was a pretty intense transition.

Luckily for us, when we had our second child, it was a totally different experience. There are a few reasons why transitioning from one to two kids was much easier than from zero to one.

It's Not as Life-Changing

Working was a huge part of my life before I had kids and I truly enjoyed it. It was something I had been doing since I was 14 and I realized that it made up a lot of my identity. Having my first child turned my world completely upside down and my day-to-day full of tasks, meetings, feeling smart and talking with adults was suddenly put to a halt.

When my second baby came around, I was already in the grind of motherhood. I'd learned how to fill my days as a stay-at-home mom and keep myself busy. Adding another baby was definitely more work, but it didn’t change my life entirely, so I settled into it quite well.

I doubt anyone ever feels like they have this whole parenting gig in the bag, but with more than one child I do feel more confident in my decisions. And I’m easier on myself.

I Had More Confidence

I doubt anyone ever feels like they have this whole parenting gig in the bag, but with more than one child I do feel more confident in my decisions. And I’m easier on myself.

Did I happen to forget the sunscreen at the park on one of the first spring days of the year? Yep.

Am I going to stay at the park, even when Google warns me of getting a sunburn in 70-degree weather, or run home immediately with crying children who are begging to stay at the park? I’ll stay and trust my gut, without the Googling. If it seems necessary, I'm now OK to ask another mom if we could borrow some sunscreen—and I don’t care if I get judged.

I'm Better Prepared

Even though we had a bunch of brand-new baby products and I had read a few parenting books with our first child, I didn’t really know what to expect.

Now, with the second baby, I truly knew how exhausted I was going to be. I knew how hard and stressful breastfeeding was; I even had a backup plan in place that I was ready and willing to implement, if it didn’t work out. My husband and I had equipped ourselves with stronger communication skills and already had a good parenting routine down.

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