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Cellulite's Letter to All the Moms Sucking It In at the Pool

Photograph by Getty Images

Hey Ladies,

It's me, your cellulite! That's right—I'm your back fat, your soft "I've had a few kids" tummy, your jiggly thighs, your wish-it-were-smaller butt, your wobbly arms, your shoulders you hate, your "God I hate my knees" knees, your double chin, your jowels, your neck fat, your cankles and even your toes that you wish were smaller. I'm the chub you keep hidden under winter sweaters. I'm the reason you haven't had food with flavor in over a year. I'm the reason you eat quinoa. I'm the dimples on your body.

It's nice to officially meet you.

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Summer's almost here, which means all of you are sharing a collective groan dreading the moment you'll have to show me off in a swimsuit at the pool. Now that spring is coming to an end and summer is on the horizon, you're Googling trainers' names, wondering if someone can whip the bod you hate so much into shape by the time the temperatures reach 90 degrees. You're ordering that 14-day cleanse, sure that you can pee your body into a bikini. Or you've thrown in the doing-it-the-natural-way towel and have crowdsourced Facebook for the name of the best plastic surgeon in town, though you swear you're asking for a friend.

And though you've been working hard all winter trying to avoid those carbs, waking up early for spin class even though it makes your vagina feel like it's been in a fistfight, your bod doesn't look like you'd hope it would by this time of year. So you're wondering how you can get through summer without ever having to put on a swimsuit and get in the pool.

I totally get it.

You've spent entire summers wrapped in a towel or hidden under a cover-up. You haven't been in a pool in so long, there's a chance you've forgotten how to swim.

It occurred to me that you've been unhappy with me ever since I showed up on your body. For some of you, I showed up when you were in high school. I was that dimply spot that your genetics ensured you'd get too, despite you being an otherwise fit girl. I met some of you once your babies were born. Having me around actually helped you have healthy babies, but I'm hard to get rid of. I know it's frustrating. And some of you first caught a glimpse of me when you got to a certain age and your metabolism took a vacation.

From the moment I arrived, you didn't hate me, you hated yourself. You denied yourself entire food groups, tortured yourself through hot yoga classes and vowed never to be seen in public in a swimsuit again. You've spent entire summers wrapped in a towel or hidden under a cover-up. You haven't been in a pool in so long, there's a chance you've forgotten how to swim.

So I have a suggestion.

What if you got rid of all those old swimsuits you've had since before you had kids that haven't fit since before you had kids? And then what if you bought a few suits you really love, even if you don't love them on you? And after that, what if you took off that cover-up, dropped that towel, exhaled and dove in?

Your body gave your children life, but now that same body is keeping you from yours.

Because the truth of the matter is, your body is your body, no matter how much you try to hide it. Your body gave your children life, but now that same body is keeping you from yours. Sure, it's no big deal to go an entire summer without jumping in the pool, but I'm not just talking about the literal swimming pool here. I'm talking about the pool of life.

I'm talking about you not hiding your way through summer. I'm suggesting you let yourself be imperfect and that you say yes to being a little bit soft. I'm suggesting that you stop hating yourself for jiggling a little more than you'd like. And I'm suggesting you just see what happens.

What will probably happen is that your body probably won't get thinner. Your cellulite will still be where it was before. You body will look the same, but you'll be different, because you'll have stopped hiding and started diving in. It's just that simple.

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So I hope you do it. I hope you go for a swim. And I hope you sit in the sun on a lounge chair without grabbing a towel to cover your wobbly bits. I hope you walk down the beach without grabbing your wrap. I hope you stop sucking it in. And I hope you do that no matter what you weigh and no matter what you look like.

It's just that simple.

Mwah,

Your Cellulite

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