You've been looking forward to bedtime all day. Maybe you had a stressful day at work, or your kids were driving you up the wall. Everyone is settled in their respective beds, but you just cannot fall asleep. Mom insomnia is a real thing. Here are some reasons why you won't be able to sleep tonight.
1. You can't stop thinking about the leftover pizza in the fridge. You were so busy feeding everyone else, you may have forgotten to get full. Now, you can hear the pizza plaintively calling you name from the cold depths of your fridge. Don't ignore the plea. Rescue that pizza.
2. Did I just hear something?
3. The baby won't stop nursing. She's teething... or sick... or just wants to never ever stop cuddling with her mama. The reasons are many, but until you have mastered sleeping while nursing (or you want your baby to sleep in a crib), then you're just out of luck.
4. You wonder about your household appliances. Did you get the clothes out of the dryer? Did you turn off the slow cooker? Is the coffee maker still keeping your late pot of coffee warm? Is caffeine the reason you can't sleep? Why did you make that coffee anyway?
5. You can't stop worrying. About your kid's grades, or your baby's recent bout of illness, or the fact that you scheduled a pap smear for tomorrow and your period is about to start any time now. Really.
6. Was that a cramp?
You start calculating exactly how much sleep you will get if you fall asleep right now.
7. You wonder about the future. What color will your baby's eyes be when she's older? How old will you be when she's 10? 18? 30? What kind of birthday party will she want next year? When should you start shopping for holiday gifts? When? What? Where? How? Why?
8. You will hear phantom babies. What was that noise? Is the baby crying? He's not awake... why do I still hear wailing? Drifting off... then more crying babies. Uggggh.
9. Did I CC everyone on that last project I emailed?
10. You start calculating exactly how much sleep you will get if you fall asleep right now. And thus begins a horrible countdown of exactly how much sleep you're not getting.
11. You can't turn off your work brain. Whether you work from home or not, some of us have a hard time turing off our work lives, even when it comes to sleep. Oh, there's another email... maybe someone somewhere needs something. Better look!
12. Wait. What was that noise?
13. Okay. Time to sleep. If I fall asleep right now, I can get 6.5 hours of sleep. Here we go.