I had this vision in my
head of their meeting. I should have known by now that with kids, it's always
best to set your expectations low. Like, really low. Because that meeting? You
know, the older brother being in awe of his "baby" and kissing her
head and holding her gently in his lap? None of that happened. None of it.
Instead, he gave her one glance and, after coming in close to try to poke her
eyeballs (don't worry, we didn't let him), he gave up and walked away,
completely ignoring her for the rest of the day.
And that is how it's been since. And we're two
And I have all of these visions, still. I told
you, I really never learn. But I want a cute sibling photo, of my oldest
holding my youngest. I want a sweet picture of the two of them bonding and
maybe taking a nap together on our king size bed.
I mean, how adorable would that be?
And instead I get a few blurry shots of him
trying to smack her on the head. Or a quick picture of the .02 seconds he will
stay still next to her, again blurry. Too blurry to even tell who it is in the
Yeah. Not happening.
Did I take away from his babyhood? Should we have waited? Is he too young to be a big brother? Are we absolutely insane?
So I'm not sure when this will change. I've had
my share of meltdowns. Did we have another baby too soon? I mean, my oldest is
still a baby himself! Did I take away from his babyhood? Should we have waited?
Is he too young to be a big brother? Are we absolutely insane?
"Yes" is the answer to that last question, by the
But I'm beginning to see that "no" is
the answer to the rest. Because really, there is no good time to have a baby.
Your oldest will struggle with something, whether it's being gentle or being
jealous, something will make the transition difficult. And the timing will
never be "perfect."
Nothing ever is.
Because yes, they are close in age. And yes, my
oldest is still a baby and now we have a newborn as well. And our life is crazy
and will continue to be for quite some time now.