New moms are amazing warriors and exhausted balls of hormones all at the same time. It can be tough to know the best way to support your friend when they have a new baby, especially if you haven't been there yourself. Below you will find five things that pretty much every new mom, whether it's her first or her fifth, would love to hear.
"I'm dropping off food." Nothing helps a new mom feel cared for quite like nourishing food. Casseroles are rad, but snacks and easy to grab breakfast and lunch items are super helpful too! Another important component to this sentence is "dropping off"—hosting visitors can be really challenging with a newborn. If you can take the pressure off and provide a care package without sitting on the couch, you earn major bonus points.
"You look AMAZING!" Even if she has spit up in her hair and is clearly on day three of her maternity yoga pants, she deserves to hear that she's glowing. Tell her that motherhood looks great on her. Part of the importance here is helping her feel seen. Of course everyone is going to fawn over the adorable baby, as they should, but it sure feels good to be acknowledged when you feel as though you exist solely to meet that baby's needs.
All they really need to hear is that you believe in them and that you're there for them.
"Tell me your birth story." Rare is the new mom who doesn't want to share their birth story. She's been through a life-changing experience and talking about it helps her process it. Plus, from terrifying to triumphant, or most likely a combination of both, birth stories tend to be truly fascinating.
"I love folding laundry!" If you're close enough to the new mom to be over hanging out with the new addition, do your best to help out. Loading the dishwasher, folding laundry, and tidying up are all super helpful. Also, if they have older kids, taking them on a walk or to the park can be a really huge help.
"You've got this." It can be hard to know what to say if your friend is having a less than blissful postpartum experience. All they really need to hear is that you believe in them and that you're there for them. If you're already a mom yourself you can let them know that it gets so much easier and that you eventually find your stride. New moms deserve a totally nonjudgmental cheerleader. Encouraging words can help them relax and enjoy the fleeting bliss that exists between and during all the hard stuff.