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18 Moms Confess: Parenting Trends We Wish Would End

Photograph by Twenty20

Every generation has its trends when it comes to pregnancy and motherhood. When I was pregnant with my oldest son (now 6), someone asked me if I was going to use cloth diapers. I looked at her like she was crazy. Why in the world would I use cloth diapers when disposable ones were so much easier?

But just as disposable diapers, replacing the heavy weight of the cloth diapers and the danger of sharp diaper pins, became popular a few decades ago, cloth diapers have made a resurgence in popularity, with thinner fabrics, Velcro instead of pins and cute covers. And yet, I still opted for disposable because I couldn’t get past the ick factor of cloth diapers.

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Social media is the place where we discover new trends—the things we never even knew were a thing until we got pregnant or became moms and started posting about our experiences. If you’re like me, you roll your eyes at most of them and maybe fake gag at your screen when someone announces the newest fad. No, I don’t want to eat my placenta. No, I don’t need a cast of my belly to remind me of how huge I was, and no, I definitely never wanted to try cloth diapers. But yes, I did get a doula in my first pregnancy (even though I ended up with a C-section) and I really, really wish I’d known about postpartum doulas because I would’ve saved my pennies to hire one with my first baby.

But for every helpful new trend, there seem to be half a dozen things we’re sick of hearing about. I asked a bunch of moms which trends they hate and these were their responses:

“The weekly 'bump date' pics with what week and fruit your baby is compared to.” — Hillary

Competitive parenting. The only way to win is to quit playing the game.” — Jill

The push to breastfeed at all costs.” — Amber

Can we help each other survive this parenting thing rather than judge the hell out of each other?

Birthday parties costing hundreds of dollars for a child so young that they can barely walk, much less know what is going on.” — Aly

A lot of people told me they dislike gender reveal parties, but Jenny really, really hates them: “Gender reveal makes me mad in more ways than one. Some do a gender reveal and a baby shower and I'm sorry, I'm not investing two Saturdays and two presents into YOUR baby. I have kids of my own to take care of.”

Crazy spellings for common names. A high school friend just named their kid Jhordin (pronounced Jordan).” — Morgan

Potty training pressure. I went through so many harsh comments about ‘letting’ my son ‘sit’ in his diapers until his third birthday.” — Sumin

Parent shaming. Our lack of support for each other is disheartening. I work a million hours a week outside of the home, and my kids are fine. You work a million hours at home, your kids are fine ... cool, now that we are past that, can we help each other survive this parenting thing rather than judge the hell out of each other?” — Emily

Saying men are having a baby. No they are not. When they're throwing up and crying, sometimes at the same time, and peeing every five seconds, then have their abdomen slit open and a bowling ball removed, which they are then required to care for, they can say they had a baby.”—Deidre

People feeling they have the right to touch your belly.” — Tamara

“The sexualization of babies, calling them heartbreaker and so forth.” — Judy

Baby showers for women only.” — Tina

Pain med shaming! Some women have very difficult deliveries and it puts more stress on the baby then if the mom can relax and do her job.” — Joie

“I think it's a safe bet to assume your child would rather you never post anything about their toilet habits on Facebook. Ever.” — Laurel

3D ultrasounds. There are studies suggesting that ultrasounds are not good for babies, and these ultrasounds are vanity not necessity.” — Maggie May

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The pervasive idea that there's one right way. Parenthood is a different experience for everyone, as is the learning curve and coping skills. Some parents don't enjoy every stage. And that's OK. You're not a bad person or a bad parent.” — Saranna

“The expectation (pushed by Hollywood) that you have to be back to a perfect figure in record time.” — Dayle

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