Jenni “JWoww” Farley hates being pregnant. She’s even quoted as saying, “I’m not a fan of pregnancy right now
with my thighs touching and my boobs changing but I know it will be worth it, and hopefully I get back to that really quickly.”
As the mother of two, I feel it’s
my duty to help JWoww understand that she’s missing the point. Pregnancy isn’t
just about birthing a human, it’s about eating whenever and whatever you want,
not feeling pressure to look good and getting waited on hand and foot.
So if you hated your pregnancy or
are dreading being pregnant someday, I urge you to think again. Pregnancy is
fabulous! Here’s why.
There is no other time in a lady’s
life except pregnancy when the world won’t shun her for eating a pizza at
4 a.m. or for ordering that foot-long sandwich just for herself. Eating for two has never
been more fun, and accepted.
2.It’s Dignified to Be Fat in Your Bikini
in, push out! When you’re pregnant, put on that bikini! The bigger your bikini
belly, the more people will come up to you at the pool and tell you, “You’re
the cutest pregnant lady I’ve ever seen!”
3.You’re Supposed to Lay Around and Do
Not since college have you spent so much time relaxing (read: watching Pitch Perfect). But when you’re knocked
up, you’re not supposed to do much else. It’s a slacker’s paradise.
You’re giving him a family. He can bring you ice cream.
Don’t Need a Reason to Be in a Bad Mood
no, “I’m sorry” when you’re pregnant. There’s no need. Just blame that baby for
that hormone surge that made you bite your mother-in-law’s head off. Chances
are she deserved it.
5. You Get to Repeat Outfits
you’re preggo, the pressure’s off. You can wear that stretchy dress for the
third day in a row, and no one cares because your belly is the size of a school
Will Tell You You’re Glowing All The Time
used to be called “sweaty with messy hair,” is now called a pregnancy glow.
This is amazing, and you should milk it for all it’s worth.
Body Is a Science Experiment
the new patches of hair, the blotchy skin and that human being growing in your
core, you’re a veritable science experiment. Which is totally cool.
Hubs is at Your Beck and Call
the hubs your own personal man servant for nine months. You’re giving him a
family. He can bring you ice cream.
9.People Throw You Parties
having a baby, so your best friend wants to throw you a pink-tastic party. Plus,
you get to leave with a ton of loot for your kid.
10. Weeping Is Not Weird
you had to hide the fact that you were a total softie. But now that you’re
knocked up, the cat’s out of the bag and the local news could bring you tears.