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Is FOND the Latest Fear for Moms?

When Covergirl invited me to attend the Katy Perry and meet her backstage with my daughter, I felt fortunate. I was excited to be able to share such an amazing experience with my little girl and do something with her that I knew she would really love. I mean, my freelance work is not making me a millionaire. But, for sure, it has awesome perks.

Once we settled in and I showed her the candy in the backstage lounge, I got a little anxious because I wouldn't be allowed to take pictures. The team would take photos of us and send back the approved ones (the ones Katy Perry looked good in), but we couldn’t take our own. If I couldn't take photos or record videos of my super happy little girl, how would she ever remember her mommy was cool enough to pull this off for her?

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The more time passed, the more freaked out I got. I started thinking of alternative ways (aka: sneaky options) for us to take a picture right then and there. Maybe someone would snap it while we greeted her, or I could ask her for a selfie with us. In that moment I asked myself, as I had done with my blogger self many times before, what would happen if I didn't record this or share it? The answer: it would be like it never happened!

As a blogger who loves social media, and has been able to create a business from it, it is not surprising that I have the need to share. As a very private mom, though, I don't like this feeling at all. How could I think that such a great moment for my little one could be anything but unforgettable? How could I allow myself to doubt that? Wasn’t her smile engraved in my heart enough? I realized in that moment that I was experiencing FOND: Fear of No Documentation.

What about the now? [...] What about putting down our devices and being present and enjoying the moment?

Thinking that not being able to photograph or record a moment somehow makes it any less valuable or real is totally insane. Yet most of us in this era of oversharing and instant gratification experience this feeling. We go to a restaurant and feel the need to show the world our perfectly placed plate. Then we complain about the service being slow. When we travel, we're so busy snapping photos, creating hashtags and checking to see how many "likes" we've received that we forget to enjoy ourselves. Don’t even get me started on those "Disney on Ice" shows, where the primary concern is capturing it all for later. What about the now? What about looking at our kids’ faces while they see their favorite characters dance and sing? What about putting down our devices and being present to enjoy the moment?

Is our obsession with capturing everything on film desensitizing us from our emotions? Are we losing that connection even with our kids? Every day it gets harder and harder to be emotionally accessible, unless, of course, it is via text infused with 10 emojis. Do not get me wrong, I’m all about technology. I am the first one to admit that I don’t go anywhere without my Galaxy S5 phone, Tab S tablet, my HP Envy x360 laptop, or my Nikon D3100 camera. But how far are we taking it that we can’t have a moment without thinking about uploading it for the whole world to see?

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It's like we have to constantly prove to others that we do enjoy a yummy meal, or we are fortunate enough to be able to take a trip, or we can get a close-up with a celebrity. In reality, we do not have to prove anything. Not recording an event does not make it any less of a reality, at least not where it matters — in our hearts and our minds.

Image via Dee Trillo

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