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What Bruce Jenner Needs to Know About Becoming a Woman

Photograph by Getty Images

Up until this point, I’ve dismissed the stories of Olympic great Bruce Jenner transitioning to becoming a woman. I hated the mean-spirited tone. If the stories are true, that Jenner is going through the process to become a woman, he should be supported, not media-bullied for the sake of a good story.

Now it seems like the story has reached a fever pitch and just might be true. As little tidbits leak to People magazine and other celebrity news sites, it’s hard to deny that the story is taking on a life of its own. If the story is true, I’m happy for Jenner. It must be liberating for him to become who he really thinks he is in the body he feels he was meant to have.

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According to new stories, Jenner’s children, stepchildren and his three ex-wives have been supportive, which surely makes what he is going through much easier. But it occurred to me that while the rest of us women have had a lifetime to become the women we are, Bruce Jenner will have a short period of time to become a woman. This, after a lifetime of living as a man. So since the one thing Jenner doesn’t know about becoming a woman is how to be a woman, I thought I’d share a few things he needs to know.

1. Women rely on their friends as much as they rely on their spouses.

Ask any woman and she’ll tell you she’d be lost without her female friends. Female friends pick up where their spouses leave off. Now you have the chance to be someone’s bestie and to have a bestie in return.

2. Women are professional multitaskers.

There’s a rumor going around that women don’t need as much sleep as men. That’s not true. We don’t get as much sleep, but it doesn’t mean we don’t need it. The truth is, we women don’t always have time for things like sleep. That’s because we’re busy moving mountains. Women are multitaskers by nature. This one may be hard for you, but you’ve got some great role models. You can do it.

The most important thing anyone needs to know about becoming a woman is that every woman is always striving to become the woman she wants to be.

3. Always wear a thong.

At some point in your day, your underwear is going to start creeping north. Since it’s going to end up in your butt anyway, you might as well start with a string up there than end up with a wad.

4. No, nail polish doesn’t last, but we still like it.

We gals get our nails done and the color feels like an entirely new accessory. Then two hours later, it chips off and you wonder why you just spent an hour getting your nails done. There are gels, but they can be hard on your nails. That’s why every woman knows to get her nails done the afternoon before a big event. Because it won't last much longer than that.

5. Always buy cheap mascara.

It’s the same as the expensive stuff. And judging by the Kardashian side of your family, you’re going to need a whole lot of mascara to keep up.

6. Women thrive on conversation with other women.

Sometimes it will seem like your girlfriends are talking about the same thing over and over again while they rehash the same story—they are. It’s how women connect. So get used to gabbing if you want to be a part of the gang.

7. You’ll hate having bangs.

At some point in your journey, a friend will suggest you get bangs. You’ll do it because that friend will also promise bangs make the wearer look younger. You’ll love your new bangs for about a day. Then you’ll have to do them yourself and you’ll longingly wait until they grow back.

8. Women find it relaxing to watch reality shows about other women.

You may have missed years of girl fights and friendship issues. But for those of us who haven’t, we find watching reality show fights that don’t involve us relaxing and refreshing.

9. Women may not be physically stronger than men, but we’re just as powerful.

As a woman, you’ll find a quiet power in yourself that isn’t about strength, volume or bravado. You’ll find you can take care of business while taking care of your family. You will find you can do anything you set your mind to. And you’ll find there’s just as much reward in running a company as running a household. So hopefully you will get the chance to do both.

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So know that we women support you—at least this woman does. Women are constantly growing, changing and finding ourselves. Most of us won’t ever experience the physical and mental transformation that you will, but you will find that most women can relate to your journey more than you’d ever think. Because the most important thing anyone needs to know about becoming a woman is that every woman is always striving to become the woman she wants to be. We are all works in progress, so to speak. Yours is just a little more drastic.

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