Our Privacy/Cookie Policy contains detailed information about the types of cookies & related technology on our site, and some ways to opt out. By using the site, you agree to the uses of cookies and other technology as outlined in our Policy, and to our Terms of Use.


What We Learn From Kelly Rutherford's Custody Battle

Some people think that money is a source of happiness. That people who have it can lead perfect lives with no worries about anything.

That's not true.

It can certainly make some things in life easier, but it is not a determining factor in our path towards bliss. When you become a parent, your priorities shift and your world revolves around the kids: what time they need to be in bed, if they did their homework, if they're eating properly. Those are the new concerns.

This can take a toll in a relationship and, once things are not amicable anymore, it can turn into a painful custody battle.

RELATED: 6 Powerful Tips to Avoid Parents' Worst Nightmare

We try not to hurt our children so we attempt to handle things as gracefully and smoothly as possible. This rarely happens. Most marriages that end in divorce carry a significant amount of baggage. Resentment and grudges can take a toll in the process by bringing the bitterness of either or, in some instances, both parties and make custody arrangements difficult. Even when couples go in with the best intentions, the burden of a financial agreement, child-rearing styles and shared time can turn the most pacifist people into sharks. Especially if one parent considers the other side to be significantly impaired or lacking the necessary skills to raise kids in a healthy environment.

Sometimes, there are worse cases than those. There are situations where children are, in fact, removed from the main caregiver and taken thousands of miles of way from their families—cases where is not only about family law, but also international laws and politics.

For example, the case of Kelly Rutherford. The former "Gossip Girl" actress has been going through one of the most excruciating and agonizing situations a mother could ever imagine. After a Los Angeles court ruled the father of her children could take the children temporarily to Monaco in 2012, they were improperly granted residency in Monaco where they have been living for the past three years. The order was just lifted, and Rutherford has been granted temporary custody. The children and their mother will, hopefully, finally and rightfully be reunited soon.

In my opinion, the judicial system failed Rutherford in many ways. First and foremost, these are U.S. born citizens who had been residing in the U.S. Although their father had lost his visa to stay in the country, he had two years to request it again, which he failed to do. Instead, he kept the children away from their mother.

Why did it take three years, a huge social media campaign and media scrutiny for a court to rule that Monaco did not have authority over the children and that they should be returned to their birth country to live with their mother? Why did this mom have to endure the frustration of not knowing her children's well-being firsthand? Why was her right to see them grow during this time superseded by their father's desire to live with them in a country that had no legal jurisdiction over them?

This is a clear example that neither money nor fame can ensure you joy or an easy ride in life. The system failed her in the worst way possible.

Saddest part: the system has done that to many other parents who have lost the right to raise their children due to technicalities. Custody can be one of the scariest processes to endure for a loving parent who wishes to do the best for their kids under challenging circumstances.

RELATED: Kids Should Not Go to the Restroom Alone

What's most important is to not lose sight of kids' best interest due to personal anger towards the other parent. However, just like Rutherford, parents need to remember to never give up and settle for less than what they know is best for their kids.

Share on Facebook?

More from entertainment