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Inside Out: The Mom Version

In Pixar's "Inside Out," 11-year-old Riley Anderson's family moves to California, uprooting her Midwest home. Joining her on her journey are five emotions: Joy, Anger, Disgust, Fear and Sadness, each one voiced by a famous actor (Amy Poehler as Joy; Bill Hader, Fear; Lewis Black, Anger; Mindy Kaling, Disgust; and Phyllis Smith, Sadness).

Our oldest daughter is still 8 years younger than Riley, but on any given day, I can see all of these characters playing out inside her mind: The elation of finding a surprise chocolate-covered raisin on the kitchen floor; the sudden angry tears over me not voicing Ursula the right way; the sadness of me dropping her off at camp (replaced within milliseconds by a glittery art project.)

But if Pixar were to shine a light inside a mom's mind, I'm guessing they'd see some very different characters. First, the not so fun ones:

RELATED: 7 Parenting Tips From Pixar's 'Inside Out'

Guilt (voiced by Lindsay Lohan)

Who better to narrate the guilty feeling we get when we choose conventional berries over organic, when we yell a little too loud, a little too quickly, or when our kid asks, "Why do you have to go to work today?"

Exhaustion (voiced by Felicity Huffman)

As Lynette Scavo on "Desperate Housewives," she depicted the classic struggle to find a balance between marriage, motherhood and career. Between her wild boys, her demanding boss, an alcoholic mother, her husband's midlife crisis, cancer and more, she knows how it feels to be drained, 24/7 … yet still keep on trucking.

Embarrassment (voiced by Jennifer Lawrence)

Your kid just looked a raven-haired, ebony-lipsticked goth right in his heavily eyelined eyes and asked, "Wow, your mom lets you wear makeup?" J. Law tripped in a ball gown in front of millions—she can easily convey your flushed cheeks, racing pulse and uncomfortable smile as she apologizes and whisks your little inquisitor away.

Judgment (voiced by the late Joan Rivers)

The cattiness you exude when you look the hot mom at the park up and down, as you realize you haven't even changed out of the tee shirt you slept in? Vintage Joan.

Nagging* (voiced by Fran Drescher)

"Oh. My. God. I've asked you 10 times to not leave your Mr. Potato head parts all over the floor. Pick them up, puh-lease."

* The first five times you ask for something to happen.

Nagging*(voiced by Bea Arthur)

"Fine. Leave the eyeballs on the ground. I'm done. Where's my wine glass?"

* The sixth time.

Mommy Brain (voiced by Betty White)

Actually, Betty White is 93 and her memory is probably better than ours.

And the happier emotions:

Pride (voiced by Oprah Winfrey)

As your daughter nails a penalty kick in her soccer game: "That's my dawwwwww-terrrrrr!"

Confidence (voiced by Kathleen Turner)

The formidable voice you hear when you've got your mom swagger on. Your toddler is thirsty at the zoo and the concession stand line is 15 people deep? Sippy cup's in your purse. Your teenage daughter felt comfortable enough to come to you with a sensitive question, and she seemed to sincerely value your opinion? Can't you practically hear Turner's powerful, throaty voice assuring you, "You've got this."

Bravery (voiced by Sofia Vergara)

Whether you're using last month's Highlights Magazine to thwack the fist-sized spider creeping up the bathtub wall, plunging your arm into a murky toilet to retrieve a dropped Transformer, or semi-reluctantly returning to work after maternity leave, every brave act will sound even fancier and more exciting when described by a bombshell with an exotic accent.

Amusement (voiced by Cameron Diaz)

You know that feeling you get when your child makes you laugh legitimately for the first time? That mix of delight and excitement and surprise? America's loveliest goofball can lend her quirky charm to narrating that distinct pleasure.

RELATED: 8 Pixar Films With the Highest Sob Factor

Wonder (voiced by you)

When you're lying in bed with them, watching them breathe and stroking their hair and thinking about what miracles they are, no one can voice that awe better than you.

Image via Disney/Pixar

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