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Bwahaha (insert evil laugh sound here). That’s the sound of your nanny laughing
because she hears it all and sees it all. She knows more about you and your family than your closest friends. If you’re lucky, she keeps your household
sane, organized and on track. As much as
she loves your kid(s), keep in mind that at the end of the day her role in your
family is that of an employee. With that
being said, here are 7 things that you should never ask your nanny:
Question 1: “Is my baby the cutest/smartest baby you’ve
ever worked with?”
Answer: She’s going to say yes. Your baby could look like a dingo in a pink
dress and she’ll say she’s beautiful. You pay her. Her answer will
always be yes.
Question 2: “You’re only feeding Timmy organic,
gluten-free, non-GMO foods all day, right?”
Answer: Yes, she’s feeding him those foods all day … in
addition to whatever else she can put in his mouth to keep him happy at the
Question 3: “Why is the TV remote in a different place?”
Answer: Because she turned on the TV. She’s human. It’s OK.
Question 4: “Do you think my husband is hot?”
Answer: No. She
doesn’t think your husband is hot. Unless your husband is Bradley Cooper, there is a very small percentage
of women that think your husband is hot … maybe .002 percent ... and that percentage
likely doesn’t include your nanny.
Question 5: “Will you accept my friend request?"
Answer: It's not a good idea to “friend” your nanny. She doesn’t want to be your “friend” and you
probably don’t want to know what she’s doing when she’s not with your
kids. Odds are she’s not doing lines of
cocaine, but nothing good can come of this arrangement.
Question 6: “Should I have more kids?”
Answer: Her answer will always be “yes.” Not because she thinks you and your husband
have the perfect combination of genes, but because more children is built in
Question 7: “OMG, did you see that?!?! (Timmy’s first
smile, rolling over, walking, etc)”
Answer: Yes, she saw it. She saw it two days ago when he did it for the actual first time. But if she’s smart she’ll shut her mouth and
act like it really was the first time Timmy rolled over.
Nannies are amazing. They are an extension of us and the true definition of “it takes a
village.” But when it comes to asking
questions, a good rule of thumb is: Don’t ask questions that you really don’t want the answers to.