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With winter's snow days and school delays, not to mention daycare closures, teacher in-service days and random Take Your Kids To Work Days, most work-outside-the-home parents eventually find themselves struggling to come up with ways to keep their kids supervised and entertained during working hours (while still actually maintaining a job).
Some people are lucky enough to be able to take their kids to work with them instead of frantically scrambling for stand-in sitters or people to cover their shifts, but that's only half the battle. What on earth is going to keep those children entertained (and out of trouble) for the next eight hours? Here's a handy list of activities to keep your kiddos busy when you have to take them with you to the office:
1. Make them clean the break room microwave
Because somebody was going to have to do it, eventually. Right? No, honestly, probably not, but you can tell your kids that cleaning it builds character or some kind of parenting nonsense like that.
2. Drop them off in that coworker's cubicle who always bores you with stories about what they dreamt last night.
Bring up Minecraft, and then leave while your kid launches into a 20-minute explanation of their strategy for keeping Creepers out of the incredibly intricate home base they just built. Paybacks!
Now might be a good time to suggest a lengthy game of Hide and Go Hide.
3. Remind your kids that they wanted you to pass their school fundraiser order form around the office to help them earn that Super Bouncy Space Ball.
Point out that—WHAT LUCK!—now they can go ask everyone themselves.
4. Let them respond to long, boring email threads for you
Nobody reads all those replies, anyway.
5. Take this opportunity to give them the Sex Talk.
They'll be begging to go back to school in no time! As an added bonus, after one person barges in and interrupts, all the rest of your coworkers will be afraid to come near your office for the rest of the day.
6. Encourage the kids to fulfill their childhood dream of wasting an entire pad of Post It notes by penning a single scribble on each one and then sticking them all over the walls.
7. Send them to the cubicle of someone who's on vacation.
Inform them that this is a great place to decorate with all those Post Its. Suggest that they fill all the drawers with pretty, shiny paper clips from the supply closet, then tell them to wrap up the wireless keyboard with several hundred layers of printer paper and packing tape. Because THAT'S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU GO ON VACATION WHILE THE REST OF US HAVE TO WORK.
8. You know what every office has too many of? Memos.
You know what office gadget kids love to use? The shredder.