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6 Downright Creepy Things We All Do to Our Kids

Nearly everything we do for our children stems from love. It's a kind of love that comes from a much deeper, more intense place than any other emotion. But if we did some of these things to anyone else, we'd be labeled as downright creepy.

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1. "Just can't get enough"

Sometimes, when my son is busy playing, I sneak up behind him to get a long whiff of his head. Although there's proven science that the scent of newborns releases an intoxicating rush of dopamine in moms, mine is long past that sweet, milky stage. In fact, it's more likely to be a combination of sweat, grease and peanut butter that I could breathe in forever.

2. "Every breath you take … "

I often sit in the dark staring at my son while he sleeps. He has no idea.

I often sit in the dark staring at my son while he sleeps. He has no idea. In my defense, my husband convinced me early on it was borderline obsessive to use a video monitor, so I consider this a compromise over settling for a less-than-awesome audio device.

3. "I have to praise you"

He can do the lamest thing and I'll praise him to the high heavens. I'm not keen on raising a post-post-millennial brat, but I can't help myself. It was only a few years ago that he was this lump of baby fat, and now he's blowing his own nose and putting on his pants correctly. High fives all around, kid.

4. "It's time for saying goodbye"

My son has been going to preschool for years and I still can't stop our protracted goodbyes when I drop him off every morning. Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, "IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou" "Bye bye! See you later! Love you! Bye!" (I know, I wouldn't want to be in the same room as us either.) This is a short-lived privilege, so I'm milking every last moment while I can.

5. "Pretty as a picture"

I'm stalkerishly snapping candids while he plays, reads, swims, eats or does any other mundane activity.

The sparse photos of my own childhood feature me smiling self-consciously, usually posed against a wall in a velvety dress and tights. My son has approximately 3,794 photos chronicling nearly every day of his life. Sometimes he's aware there's a camera on him, other times I'm stalkerishly snapping candids while he plays, reads, swims, eats or does any other mundane activity that I somehow think is worth capturing.

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6. "Isn't s/he lovely?"

You know when a newborn baby yawns or sneezes and the whole room goes "awwww?" Yeah, I still do that. Strangely, my Facebook feed no longer has the outpouring of support it once did. But I find that every age brings a new wave of adorable gestures, facial expressions and quirky phrases. My most recent favorite gem: "Hey, mommy! I gotta go to the moon to get some cheese. Because I have a saw." OK, I guess you had to be there.

I'll stop. Not really.

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