I consider myself a pretty low-key mom. I let my kids take
their snacks all over the house, I don't mind it when they pull the cushions
off the couch or even fill bags with toys and toss them all over the house
while playing pirate (the bags are their treasure, obviously). But the moment
they start sticking their feet under the living room rug, I lose it.
Maybe it's because I really love my rug; it's blue with a big cream-colored medallion pattern. I bought it two
years ago on sale and I get
so many compliments on it. Or maybe I'm just kidding myself. Maybe I'm not that
low-key and maybe all those other things really bother me and I'm just
repressing them and repressing them until I see feet under the rug and just
I spoke to other moms about that one little thing that
their kids do that push them over the edge. Before you
read, I would like to give you a trigger warning: This post may raise your blood pressure and make you laugh but also cry. Read with hard liquor.
sheets and blankets and rigging up forts, securing the edges by closing them
into dresser drawers, which I taught them to do." – Katie Shenk Hajolian
2. "We have a
walk-through bathroom that becomes party central as soon as I walk in the door.
Why, children, why? Last week, my toddler tried to climb onto my lap every time
I sat down to go to the bathroom and he'll stand right in front of me and close
his eyes if I request privacy. Funny, until it's not!!" – Carol Heffernan
3. "Pulling the
cushions off the sofa. WHY? WHY EVERY DAY?" – Allison Slater Tate
4. "When mine were little, bath time sent me over the
edge. I finally made my husband take it over because I wanted them to be able
to have fun and splash around in the bath, but frankly, by the time we got to
that point in the day/evening, I was so done with playtime. Every time they
splashed or poured water or wanted bubbles, all I could see was the mess I was
going to have to clean up after they went to bed. I just wanted them to get in,
get clean and get out. Dad was much better at letting them goof off and then
cleaning up while I sat downstairs with a glass of wine." – Kari O'Driscoll
5. "They cram
their toy purses full of crap from the play room and then unload the crap in
another room. They basically enjoy hauling crap from one location to another."
–Jenny Dunn Pray
6. "Refusing to eat food they used to eat and taking
every single toy and putting it in their fort after bedtime." –Jessica
7. "Ignoring the
imaginary (but very, very large) 'OFF DUTY' sign flashing over my
head after I have already put them to bed at least once." – Shoshana Kordova
8. "When they put their dishes in the sink even though
the dishwasher is right next to it." – Judy Mollen Walters
9. "WIPING BOOGERS ON WALLS AND FURNITURE OMG." –
Rachel Reiff Ellis
10. "Stuffing food wrappers deep inside the couch
because they're too lazy to throw them away." – Kim Kankiewicz
11. "Taking forever to get out of the car. Specifically,
when they decide they want to get out of the furthest door from where they are
sitting. See also: Climbing on piles of folded laundry while I'm folding them."
– Olivia Hinebaugh
12. "The constant bickering. I can't take the 'He's
sitting too close to me!' 'That's my seat!' 'It's my turn!' "He breathed
on me.'" – Jenna Bagnini
13. "When he says he doesn't like a food before he even
tries it. You asshole, you're not allowed to say that until you taste it."
– Claire Zulkey
14. "Put. The. Caps. BACK ON THE GODDAMN MARKERS!"
– Robin Marty
15. "They use pencils until they're damn near pinky
length. It makes no sense that this would irk me, but it does. A tiny pencil's
existence will only make me roll my eyes and throw it away. But a child using a
tiny pencil? Fire from my head." –Arnebya Herndon
16. "Ignoring me and pretending not to hear so that I
need to repeat myself multiple times and usually it's to do something for them!"
– Alisa Gibsman Schindler
17. " Right now it's tuneless humming. ALL THE TIME.
It's driving me mental." – Margaret Brodie
18. "My 2-year-old wants to do everything himself. So
much so that he'll undo what I've done so he can't do it. He takes his pants
off if I put them on. He unbuckles his seat belt if I buckle it. Today, he
threw all the clean clothes out of the laundry basket because his brother took
them out of the dryer before he could. Frustrating!" – Jen Simon
19. "What gets me is my 5-year-old's tendency to put
things in my face—all the things too close all the time." – Jennifer K.