"Oh God," my son muttered to himself as he worked to put his shoes on the right feet. "Um, what did you say?" I asked him. "What?" he said. "We don't say that," I said, and hoped he wouldn't ask why, because I didn't have a good comeback ready, especially because I think it's quite possible that we do say that. "Oh God!" is often my go-to generic sympathetic response. Insurance company, broken toilet, dumb boss at work, you say? Oh God! That is, I mean, oh gosh. I'm trying to change.
I know I'm not the only one: Here are the tales of nine other parents who heard their little sweethearts picking up some of Mom and Dad's favorite phrases:
"When my daughter was 2 1/2, we were riding in the car and she said something I couldn't quite hear. I asked her to repeat it, and she said, 'I said turn up the goddamned music, Mama.'"
- Alissa W., mom of three
RELATED: Why 1-Year-Olds Are the Worst Ever
"When my son was 3, he started saying, 'What the f--- are you doing?' It took us a while to figure out where he picked that up ... turns out it's something Mom utters in traffic pretty frequently."
- Steve G., dad of three
"My 10-month-old has a silicone teething rosary that keeps her occupied during Mass. She's one of the better-behaved children there and normally only has to be removed from an hour-long Latin service for diaper changes. I totally look all holy and like I know what I'm doing with her. Until the Sunday she dropped it on the floor and said, 'Shit!'"
- Leeandra N., mom of one
"My kid started saying 'Damn it!' from age 2."
- Athaliah R., mom of two
Sometimes out of the blue my 3-year-old will say, "Nice signal, douchebag."
"Yesterday my 7-year-old told Nana that he anticipates that 'Second grade's gonna be brutal.'"
- Fran P., mom of two
"My 3-year-old daughter says, 'Just put that anywhere, pal!' when somebody accidentally drops something.”
- Andy W., dad of two
"My 3-year-old told me, 'You're giving me a headache.'"
- Colleen H., mom of three
"My 3-year-old put down a large box she carried into the house, sighed heavily, and said, 'Jesus Chwist.'"
"My 5-year-old likes to say, 'What's it to ya, huh?'"
- Nannette P., mom of one
“Sometimes out of the blue my 3-year-old will say, 'Nice signal, douchebag.' Hazard of having a Boston driver as a parent.”
- Lisa M., mom of two