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The One Thing All Parents Need But Aren't Getting

Photograph by Twenty20

Honeymoons are awesome. Every bride deserves to chill after the craziness of her wedding day, plus it's good to have a place to wear all the pretty lingerie from the bridal shower at least once.

Babymoons are smart, too. Slipping in a little R & R before the birth gives moms-to-be a last chance to nap by the pool, read a book or finish a conversation with her partner for, oh, the next 10 years or so.

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So, riddle me this, moms—why hasn't anyone invented a kid-moon? I'm talking about a society-approved, totally child-free vacation that all moms get to take some time after becoming a parent. Ideally, it involves a responsible grown-up sleeping at my house (Grandma, I'm looking at you) while my husband and I go somewhere that doesn't have a water slide or a kids' menu and try to remember why we like each other. Because I think we still do, but sometimes it's hard to tell.

In other words, we need a vacation from our kids.


And I don't want to have to feel guilty about it. I want it to be standard practice—something so common and encouraged, that you'd feel like a total loser if you skipped it.

This is how a kid-moon should work: I want to get emails from Travelzoo and Orbitz touting their special kid-moon deals to places like Mexico and Hawaii. Airlines should automatically upgrade any couple flying on their kid-moon. Babysitting services should offer standard kid-moon packages so parents don't have to calculate overnight pay—it's confusing.

My husband and I are in desperate need of a kid-moon, because at this point, a two- to three-hour date night isn't making a dent in our need to reconnect and relax.

Workplaces should automatically give employees an extra week's vacation time for the kid-moon. And doctors, therapists and especially marriage counselors should remind their tired mama patients, "Have you taken your kid-moon yet? I think it would do you a world of good."

My husband and I are in desperate need of a kid-moon, because at this point, a two- to three-hour date night isn't making a dent in our need to reconnect and relax. Usually, I spend the first half hour wishing I didn't have to go out. Then, once I'm at the restaurant, I'm unable to stop myself from babbling about our children. By the time the wine kicks in and we start to get a little flirty, it's time to go relieve the babysitter.

RELATED: Dear Baby, When You Are Asleep

One evening just doesn't cut it. We need a kid-moon.

The actual kid-moon could take whatever form you desire. If you love to ski but your kids are still working on their walking game, hit the slopes! If you've got wanderlust, but don't want the screaming children in coach to be yours, grab that passport and go! Or if you fantasize about sleeping the entire time, with half of that time being on a beach, feel free to join me because that's my idea of heaven.

I know that if I took a kid-moon, it would be help me feel like, well, me again. And it would be amazing not only for myself and my relationship, but also for my kids because I'd come back to them full of energy and gratitude, ready to get elbows deep in fingerpaint and glitter. It would be a total win-win.

Who's with me on this kid-moon movement?

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