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What Not to Say to a SAHM

I never planned to be a stay-at-home mom (SAHM). Though raised by one, I had other plans for my life, including two degrees and travel and living in a big city. Falling in love happened. And then marriage. And then moving across country. And then, well, baby Ramona happened.

Our decision to have me stay at home with Ramona hinged as much on financial reasons (I wasn't making enough money to justify paying someone to look after her) as it did on the value we put on the benefits of having a parent at home. This second part was most likely inspired by the fact that we were both raised by SAHMs.

It's been nearly two years since we've had Ramona, and two years since we've chosen not to find a way for me to go back to work. We've decided instead that it's a good thing for me to stay at home with her and man the helms.

It's not easy. I can tell you that—just the same way my best friend who is a working mom will tell you it's not easy. Nope, motherhood is not easy. But still, mothers of all stripes get told some pretty crazy things. Unsolicited advice and naive questions abound. And in my two-year career as a SAHM, I can tell you some things I've been told or asked, and explain to you why you should not say or ask these things to any stay-at-home mom you encounter. I cannot guarantee that some of these won't seem contradictory. Give me a break. Give all mamas a break!

Click here to see what not to say to a SAHM

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