main concern as a mom is the well-being of my child. My parenting isn’t anything out of the
ordinary or super special in any way, but I’m doing what I believe to be the
most important — being there for my kids. I aim to be present, emotionally
accessible and to keep a smile on my face, even when the world is crumbling. I want to give them that sense of comfort and
reassurance that there is, and always will be, a constant component in their
knowing that I do my best, I still question myself at times. It's something I think most moms are concerned about, especially
working moms. We tend to carry the constant guilt of leaving our kids to go to
work, even if it’s necessary for them to have a good life. It’s an unavoidable
past Christmas, my daughter helped ease some of that anxiety. It was the moment I had
dreamed of since she was born, where she would tell me, just once, “Mommy, it’s
OK, you’re doing a good job!” It came in the form of a tiny box. In the sea of all
the presents on top of the couches and floor, there was a little box I didn’t
recognize. As I
looked at it, I couldn’t help but wonder what it was and who it was for.
I got more excited about a present than I have in years.
My biggest judge, and the only opinion that truly matters when it comes to my parenting, had told me: You got this.
The tiny box
contained a little note saying, “For Mommy, from Liam and Sophia. We love you.”
At the bottom there was a lipgloss, one of my daughter’s favorite, that I had
given her. My eyes were filled with tears and my heart was completely full with
joy and surprise. I didn’t know what to say or do, except cry.
Image by Dee Trillo
At that very
moment, with that sweet and unexpected gift, my daughter had given me what I needed
the most and no money in the world could ever buy. She had validated me as a
mother. She had told me how much she loved me, how she noticed my love for her and how she knew that when I said, “You’re my everything,” I really meant it.
She had given me the greatest gift that a mom could ever dream of.
was jealous, but I didn’t care because I felt proud that my job as a mother had been done to her satisfaction. My biggest judge, and the only opinion that
truly matters when it comes to my parenting, had told me: “You got this.
I may be a helicopter parent, but as long as long as I’m fulfilling my duty as a mother to the best of my abilities— then I don’t care.
I want my
children to feel secure and happy, so I do my best to be encouraging and
supportive while establishing rules and boundaries. I guide and discipline them
with patience and love (even when I know they’re speeding up the process of my
hair turning grey). I analyze their taste in food and books, as much as their
behavior around other people, and look for ways to help them communicate better
and navigate their surroundings with grace and politeness. I strive to be their
friend and their source for information when they feel sad or upset or when
they are curious about anything.
My main goal
in life is to raise them to be responsible, kind, honest and hard-working
individuals who value others and respect everyone’s culture and lifestyle. I
may be a helicopter parent, but as long as long as I’m fulfilling my duty as a
mother to the best of my abilities, then I don’t care.
Mothers, if society tells you, "Don’t kiss that boo boo," yet you do and see the comfort in their soul, then please go ahead and kiss it 100 times. As I have learned from a wise 6-year-old, we are accountable for our actions and decisions as parents only to our kids — and nobody else.