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bus pulls away and your eyes tear up. Funny, you think, I'm not chopping
onions. But still, the tears fall from your eyes and you realize: oh, goodness,
that's my baby. My baby just left on the school bus!
take your camera out and get a shot of the bus as it rounds the corner, away
from your house. When you check later, all you've got is a blurry pic of some
What if some older kid bullies my precious, tiny baby?
silently curse yourself for forgetting to snap a photo of your kid getting on
the bus. These are memories, dammit.
you walk back into the house, you wonder if your child was belted in. You
realize that you didn't even check the bus for safety—are there harnesses? Lap
belts? You can't be sure. You wonder whether or not you should call the bus
bus company assures you that each child has an appropriate seat belt. Lap belts
for the older kids and harnesses for the little ones. Since your child is
young (a baby, really. Practically a fetus. How did I put that tiny little
thing on a school bus?), you can rest assured that your child is buckled in
You hang up the phone and realize that you have the entire day to yourself.
children? Did he just mention older children? "Older kids" means bullies. What if some older kid bullies my
precious, tiny baby?
decide to calm yourself down with a cup of coffee and some morning television.
The first news story you see is about a school bus crash. You never get around
to making that cup of coffee.
8. You Google furiously, looking for evidence of a bus crash in your area.
call the school. After all, it's OK to bug them. You pay a lot in school
taxes each year. Isn't it their job to tell you whether or not your baby is
still alive and well?
10. The school assures you that your child
got off the bus and is happily ensconced in his or her new classroom. You hang
up the phone and realize that you have the entire day to yourself. You do an
impromptu Risky Business-style run through the house without your pants on, and
then go out and enjoy your day.