up with a sister means speaking in whispers late at night when you're
supposed to be in bed, fighting but also making each other
laugh at the dinner table, saving each other from getting in trouble and being thick as thieves. When one becomes a mama, the other becomes an aunt.
And just like that, your sister becomes a lifeline
in a way you've never experienced.
I gave birth, my sister was the first one to ask me, "How are you?"
She'd ask me the same thing months later. Both times I wouldn't know
where to begin, but it was still nice to be asked.
she's the only thing keeping me sane. She's been there when I've
needed time to work, or just needed a break or a date night. In the
early months of motherhood, she'd come over so I could use that time
to take a shower or eat a sandwich. Never did I imagine that would
mean so much. These days, she comes to our home full of energy, ready
to pick up a toddler who always fall under her spell. Once in a while we have a sister date, and she'll whisk me away for an afternoon of
window shopping and chatter.
motherhood would be so different without sisterhood.
Cool aunts ride in on the breeze. It's always been too long since we last saw them.
are different from mothers, but they're also like stand-in mothers in
all the important ways. They love your kids, play together, feed them
and put them to bed. My sister teaches my daughter new things every
time she visits. In a way, she's like a mom minus the exhaustion.
After all, my sister gets to go home at the end of the day. Toddler
behavior that might frazzle a mom amuses an aunty.
think children sense the difference. When my sister visits, my
daughter will run up to her, her whole face a smile, yelling "Aunty!"
Theirs is an effervescent kind of love.
But aunties are the intermediary between both worlds. They keep us informed.
aunts ride in on the breeze. It's always been too long since we last
saw them. That's part of the cool aunt allure: who knows what
adventures aunty's out having? "What do adults who don't have kids
do anyway," they might wonder. We moms get to hear about it first,
in sisterly confidence of course. Sometimes it makes me miss the days
before kids. Sometimes this settled life seems like a refuge in
contrast to what's out there.
aunties are the intermediary between both worlds. They keep us
informed. What's going on with the extended family? What events are
coming up? What's funny these days? My sister always knows. Sisters
make us laugh in a way only sisters can—belly laughs that make our
jaws hurt. Suddenly we're kids again.
makes it a little harder for us to spend time together—just us two.
But we manage in different ways. Instead of a late night pizza, we
might have an afternoon coffee. Rather than stay out all night, we'll
catch a morning yoga class together. Or we'll spend time as a family,
with the kids and the noise and the frenzy of it all.
moments in between, we'll look at each other in mutual wonder at where
life has taken us. From girls to women to mothers and aunts. But
always, always sisters.