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We Said What On Our Match.com Profiles?

The other day, I decided to tackle cleaning out and organizing the drawers in my bedside table. They had become junk drawers, overflowing with stuff I don't need to the point I can't find things I do.

As with many projects of this type, it turned into a journey down memory lane. At the very bottom of a pile of papers, I came across my husband's Match.com profile.

I had been very wary of online dating. In fact, I refused to participate for a long time, despite the fact friends and family begged me to try it. One day I realized I was not actually meeting men—at least not the kind I was hoping to.

I set up a Match.com profile.

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In the less than two weeks I was on the site, I was propositioned more times than I could count. I had one less than stellar date. My online dating experience was fulfilling the stereotype I'd had in my head.

Until I met the man who would become my husband.

After emailing for a while and then talking on the phone, we agreed to meet for a drink after work. It was a "safe" choice. If things didn't go well, we could part ways easily without having invested too much time.

That drink turned in to dinner. And a date the following night. In fact, we went out together every night for two weeks straight. At which point, we each deactivated our Match.com accounts.

This past summer, we celebrated the 10th anniversary of that drink.

When I showed my husband the treasure I'd found in my drawer, he excused himself for a moment and returned with a printout of my old Match.com profile. We had a blast comparing them.

Him:

"Friends would describe me as honest and reliable—you can count on me to be there, to do what I say and say what I mean. Socially, I can be comfortable in a tux or blue jeans, at the symphony or a football game. I'm an affectionate person; holding hands and physical closeness are important to me. You could say I'm well-rounded, but what's missing is someone to explore and discover with. My match is an intelligent, articulate woman who has a great smile and likes to laugh. She is a low-maintenance woman who has sown her wild oats but still enjoys getting out and enjoying life. I like a woman who is kind and understanding of others. She has learned to be independent, but knows I am there for her when needed."

I'd also found all the sweet, sappy love notes my husband sent me in the early days of our relationship. When I showed him, he replied, "Aw! I need to say mushy stuff like that more often."

Me:

"I am a very positive, social and outgoing person. Direct and honest. A bit on the sassy side. And am looking for the same. I am blessed with a great network of friends and a close family. I enjoy exploring, and will try just about anything once. I can be a homebody or a party girl. It depends on my mood. Laughter is critical. I love someone with a good sense of humor. I'm very low maintenance. A jeans and t-shirt kind of girl. (Although I can go glam with the best of them when the situation calls for it.) Love sports. Long walks on the beach. A glass of wine and great conversation. Spending a rainy day in bed with a good book. Laughing until my belly aches. Dancing like I just don't care. I'm very satisfied with my life, but know finding a loving partner with whom to share it can add so much…"

We laughed at the photos and descriptions of our interests and lifestyles. The general ridiculousness of trying to find your life's mate via computer. But overall, we agreed we had represented ourselves accurately. And do in fact make a pretty great match.

I'd also found all the sweet, sappy love notes my husband sent me in the early days of our relationship. When I showed him, he replied, "Aw! I need to say mushy stuff like that more often."

We both do. Because love can easily become buried in the responsibilities, stresses and tedium of the everyday. Life will get in the way if you let it. Keeping love strong takes commitment and work.

It is important to regularly focus on us as a couple and remember why we came to be one in the first place. We have to tend to our relationship. Give it the attention it both needs and deserves, so it can continue to thrive.

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Finding our Match.com profiles was a great way to celebrate why we love each other. And renew our commitment to our relationship.

It also served to remind me to take time to laugh until my belly aches. Dance like I just don't care. Live in the moment and savor each one. Life has a way of getting in the way of that, too.

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PHOTOGRAPHY BY: Steve Ando

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