With Valentine's Day being thrown at us every time we walk into a store, I'm reminded this will be the third time this holiday has haunted me a bit since my marriage has ended. While my ex-husband and I never did anything huge to celebrate the holiday, it is the day of love. And, just like all the other holidays, it can be a reminder that your marriage is over and leave you thinking back to happier times.
Of course, that's normal and natural, but I have a PSA to all the divorced moms out there: I know you're probably just recovering from all the other holidays we just got through. I realize you're picking yourself up and trying to get through one day at a time and Valentine's Day may be slapping you in the face every damn time you walk into Target to get milk or diapers because there's flowers, candy and lingerie hanging everywhere, but there's a bunch of things you can do on Valentine's Day to get yourself out of your post-divorce funk.
Trust me, they work.
1. Stay in, if you want to, and ignore the whole production.
You don't have to celebrate at all or feel like you need to have a date, whether it's with girlfriends or a handsome lover. Take the pressure right off yourself. I've found some of my favorite dates have been with myself, a box of cookies, and warm pajamas straight from the dryer.
2. Plan a big bash with your best girls.
We all have special friends in our life who have helped us wade through the messy stuff. Throw a Galentine's Day bash to celebrate the friends who have seen you through to the other side. Have everyone bring a dish, bust out the face masks, crank up the music and burn crap from your exes if you feel the need. Mostly, make the night a celebration about you and your friendship.
Remember, you deserve it because you are an amazing mother and this journey has not been an easy one.
3. Plan a special family night with your kids.
This is my absolute favorite way to celebrate Valentine's Day when I have my kids. It usually involves Chinese food, bowling and lots of candy being passed around. They love this holiday because I always have and when they are with me, the night is all about them. After all, they are my favorite way to celebrate the day of love.
4. If you want to get laid that night, do it.
Maybe you aren't in a committed relationship and you just want a night of fun. What better time to break a dry spell, call an old standby or get yourself on a dating site? We all have different needs and wants at different times in our lives, and you are a grown woman who knows what she wants. Don't be afraid to ask for it and get yours.
5. Treat yourself.
Whether you stay on your sofa and hit up Amazon Prime, or hit the mall for the evening, get a pedicure or massage, treat yourself to something that will make you feel special. Remember, you deserve it because you are an amazing mother and this journey has not been an easy one.
Sure, maybe some see this as a silly holiday they aren't really into celebrating, but it can also be a time when couples who have split are feeling lonely, nostalgic and thinking of all the years they did have a partner to spend a lazy February evening with.
If you have been through a divorce, you can start some of your own traditions and bring life back to Valentine's Day in a way that feels true to you.