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Uncle Sam Wants Your Uterus

“It seems to be, first of all, from what I understand from doctors, it’s really rare.If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down.

Let's face it, something this stupid transcends politics. As jaws across America dropped at would-be Missouri Senator Todd Akin's "legitimate rape" quote over the past couple of days, comedians grappled with how to make fun of something that was already so sublimely ridiculous. We think The New Yorker's Andy Borowitz nailed it with this take:

ST. LOUIS (The Borowitz Report)—Missouri Senate candidate Todd Akin doubled down on his controversial remarks about the female body today, proposing a prominent national-security role for the uterus.

“From what I understand, there’s nothing that the uterus doesn’t know,” Rep. Akin told a reporter on KTVI-TV. “It’s almost like Spider-Man’s ‘spidey sense,’ if you will, except the tingling goes on down in the lady parts.”

Rep. Akin said that given the uterus’ extraordinary powers of detection, the female reproductive system should be America’s secret weapon in the war on terror.

Read more here.

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