Fifth-Grader Offers Sage Marriage Advice to His Teacher
byKaitlin StanfordJul 22, 2014
Making the rounds this week is one kid's advice for his soon-to-be wed teacher. And it is all sorts of hilarious.
On computer-printed, laminated paper, 10-year-old Ethan offers up some wise words for Miss Ruckus, who is about to walk down the aisle with a certain Officer Mike. When it comes to what makes a marriage work, Ethan is pretty sure he knows the drill, and he tries ever-so-hard to impart a few morsels of his wisdom on the happy couple. After all, who better to learn from than a 10-year-old kid, seasoned in this game they call life?
First things first, Ethan strongly suggests that Officer Mike should always do as Miss Ruckus says — no matter what. (Clearly, he was brought up in the "happy wife, happy life" school of thought.) To that, we say: Bingo, little Ethan. Bingo.
Beyond that, the fifth-graders advice meanders from warning Officer Mike he should never tell Miss Ruckus she's fat – under any circumstances – to always paying their car insurance. (An important life lesson they should probably get out of the way while they're young.)
But we won't spoil the rest for you. Enjoy:
Pretty cute. (We love penguins, too!) The letter was first shared by Reddit user cjs723, who shared in her post that the original letter was written for a friend of hers.
The comments on Reddit have been flowing ever since, with a unanimous thumbs up to all of Ethan's suggestions. "This kid has his priorities straight," wrote user carjack7.
Still, user Quxote may have taken Ethan's points a bit too seriously, writing, "As a lifelong resident of the Philly area ... Pat's and Geno's are for tourists and 3 a.m. drunk food cravings. The best cheesesteaks in Philly are Steve's Prince of Steaks." (Duly noted, Quxote. Duly noted.)
Ethan's advice reminded us of another list of wisdom we read back in February, when two very wise girls wrote up 30 boyfriend rules a lady must always follow. They included finding a man who doesn't pick his nose, have a weird last name or tattle tale.