If you want to know if you've found "the one," Amy Betters-Midtvedt has some spot-on advice after decades of marriage. The mom and blogger at Hiding in the Closet With Coffee shares the signs of true love on Facebook in a post that has got everyone hooked.
Amy was inspired to write the post when she couldn't find her wallet and was stuck at the store with a cart full of groceries. She snapped a photo of her husband, Todd, as he walked in with his credit card actually smiling. Despite having to leave work, he didn't throw shade at his wife or leave her to figure it out alone. He only chided her for doing an errand he was responsible for.
Throughout her 25-year relationship with Todd, the moments that remind Amy of their love aren't fancy-schmancy ones like rose-petaled and candle-lit baths and lavish gifts. These grand acts, she warns younger people like her two teen daughters, can be more showy than meaningful.
"Do not be fooled by big, showy promposals and giant cards with candy bars glued to them with some cute saying or by your name spelled in pepperoni by a boy who's asking you to homecoming. That isn't the stuff that lasts and let's be honest ... moms are totally helping them with those things. Watch how he treats you when Instagram isn't looking," Amy writes.
The more telling gestures that last are smaller but no less romantic. In college, it could be going out of his way to get the food you're craving, helping you carry your heavy flower-patterned backpack without shame or doing the chores you hate.
To prove her point, Amy recounts real love in action in her 40s, and the signs are still there:
"Love also looks like me coming downstairs to a full pot of coffee every morning because coffee is love. Love looks like all the lunches being made already so I can enjoy that aforementioned cup of coffee. Love looks like someone washing the dishes while his wife catches up on 'This Is Us' while plopped on the couch not helping at all. Love looks like a super patient dad doing the 5-year-old's homework with him every morning so I can get to work on time. Love looks like running to the store before bed after your wife has forgotten to buy milk because you know the morning will be easier if we can serve up some cereal," she wrote.
Amy's message rings true for many of her readers, with several people leaving comments about their own stories of the little (but best) things.
"Love is your husband lifting up the corner of the blanket and sliding a plate with a doughnut underneath so you can have 'breakfast' without leaving the warmth of your blanket cocoon," shared one commenter.
"Love is a man that holds your head up while you are sick as a dog at the toilet!!!" writes another.
For Mom.me contributor Sherri Kuhn, what she wants her daughter to see in her marriage also isn't just the hugs and kisses and the "stuff."
"My husband and I aren't big on flowery gestures like holding hands or walking arm-in-arm. But he has my back 24/7 whether I need advice, an extra set of hands in the kitchen, a shoulder to cry on or just someone who will listen to me whine. That right there is worth more to me every single day than a year's worth of roses," Kuhn writes.
So, to all those in the early stages of a relationship, take heed. And, if you're having a little trouble trying to get your love across, here are 20 unexpected ways to say, "I love you."