Ali Fedotowsky-Manno confessed in a blog post yesterday that, at times, she feels resentful of her husband. The former "Bachelorette" star was honest about how challenging it has been to adjust to being a mom of two. It doesn't help that she sees her husband, radio personality Kevin Manno, leave for work every day while she's left at home trying to work and care for her 9-week-old son, Riley, and 2-year-old daughter, Molly.
"Honestly, I find myself feeling angry at Kevin sometimes because he GETS to go to work every day and get a break. I remember going to work after we had Molly and feeling like it was a vacation and not even work," the mom wrote. "And my 'mom job' at home is 10 times harder now that we have two kids, so I bet going to work will feel like a spa day once I go back (when I’m emotionally ready to leave Riley)."
She added on Instagram that she needs an emotional and physical break, because wearing Riley in a baby carrier 90 percent of the time is not doing wonders for her back.
This week has been challenging for Fedotowsky-Manno, who was "on a total high " last week, "surrounded by love and positive vibes in every aspect of my life." This week, though, the mom said the struggle was so real she stayed in her pajamas all day for most of the week and showered once.
"Trying to keep up with my business endeavors, run my blog and take care of my two small children has really proved to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done," Fedotowsky-Manno wrote. "I don’t even know if I can say it’s something I’m 'doing' because I feel like I’m not even accomplishing it. I just feel like I’m failing at it."
Many stay-at-home moms can relate to her experience—all the stress and lack of gratitude can make moms feel defeated, even angry. When moms are the default parent and carrying most of the emotional labor, resentment can grow toward their partners as well as their children. Fedotowsky-Manno was stuck in that space, too. She admitted to being incredibly upset with her daughter, Molly, when she was throwing a tantrum and the baby was screaming. And when her husband got home from work, the mom found herself breaking down into tears and throwing her own tantrums at him.
Luckily, the mom will have some part-time help from their nanny next week to recover her sanity. Maybe parents can take a leaf out of her book and ask for help when possible. For those riding the parenting waves solo for a while, here's how one mom stopped resenting her family for needing her and finally learned how to enjoy motherhood.