As if we needed any further evidence of her awesomeness, Tina Fey swung by Letterman last week, got to talking about her kids, and made one hilarious admission: her 2-year-old Penelope is a real "weirdo." (Man, isn't there always one?) While her 8-year-old daughter Alice was always pretty much a parent's dream, it turns out her newest kid has a tendency toward some questionable and creepy behavior.
"The little one is such a … she might be a sociopath," Fey half-joked, admitting that she forgot her kids were "two different people" and was once naive enough to think that they would be more similar since they're both girls.
Among little Penelope's recent activities? Oh, just shoving glass paperweights in her mouth, nearly eating a live crab on the beach, and choking her mom. (Yep, choking.)
"I was giving her a bath one night," explained Fey, "and she was overtired—in her defense—and I said, 'OK, bath time over. She got real mad that I took her out of the bath. ... She looked me square in the eyes, and with two tiny little hands, choked me."
Fey immediately pointed out the utter hilarity and ridiculousness in the situation, given the fact that 2-year-olds, for all their passion and strong-will, are "not strong enough to kill you" despite their every intention. At least, not yet anyway. "Try again in a couple of years, Penelope!" Fey joked.
Her 2-year-old also likes to intentionally act out scenarios she's been told not to—e.g., touching the stove or choking the family dog—and then deliver a flat, insincere apology when she's been scolded. "Oh ... sorry," she says.
Why hasn't anyone else compared a 2-year-old's behavior to a sociopath's before? We're not exactly sure; since it feels alarmingly accurate at times. (Oh, wait ... we did do that.) Watch Fey's hilariously on-point portrayal of the Terrible Twos/general kid weirdness in action: