After we broke the news of our pregnancy, everyone’s first
word was, “Congratulations!” And then, nearly every person said, “Get ready for
I figured that.
been pregnant before, but I’m definitely no stranger to the “advice” everyone
feels the need to share with a parent. And, while I’m being honest, I
think that being a stepparent makes the advice I’ve received even harder to
stomach some days.
But I was
prepared. I knew that people would have their opinions on breastfeeding, on
cloth diapering, on vaccines and epidurals. I knew they would want to tell me
all about their experiences and their personal stories. I knew this.
What I did
not know was how sensitive I would be to their “advice.”
not wanting an epidural? Eighteen people have to tell me that I have no idea
what that pain is like and then they say, “Trust me, you’ll be happy to have
someone that I’m thinking about cloth diapering, especially since I work from
home, and I have to hear dozens of people telling me that I’m crazy and naïve.
“There is absolutely no way you will have time for all of that. You’re going to
be so exhausted, you won’t know which way is up. Trust me.”
It makes me feel like they don’t think I can handle it.
I do some
research and decide that, unless there is a major health problem with me and/or
the baby, I do not want to be induced and what does everyone tell me? “You have
no idea what it’s like to be overdue. You’re going to be so ready to pop that
you’ll be begging someone to break
your water and get the baby out, no matter what it takes.”
I get that
people have their opinions and thoughts on childbirth, I do. I understand that
some people really did feel the way everyone is telling me I will feel, but I
can’t help but get a little miffed every time I receive some “advice.” It makes
me feel like they don’t think I can handle it. It makes me feel like they’re
trying to cut me down by telling me I have no idea what I’m doing and that I
“just don’t know” what I’m in for with this pregnancy.
But so far?
I’m doing OK. The debilitating morning sickness everyone told me I would
experience? No nausea here. In fact, the more people told me about how
miserable I should be feeling these first few weeks, the more nervous I got
that something was wrong. And then I had to remember that, despite the, “Trust
me, you’ll be so sick, you won’t be able to stand,” declarations, it doesn’t
mean it’s true.
I know I
have a long few months ahead of me with more “advice,” but man if I’m not
already feeling irritated about all of it. I have a feeling that with my
“raging hormones” (TRUST ME), it won’t get any better.
Also, now I’m terrified that if I do decide to
have an epidural or I buy a box of disposable diapers? The first thing I’m
going to hear is, “I told you so.”
That won’t end well.
were pregnant, did you receive a lot of unsolicited advice? Did people tell
you that some of your ideas were ridiculous or that you had no idea?