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Why You Need to Get Pregnant ASAP

Photograph by Twenty20

It's the tail end of summer and I'm still pregnant. In the heat. I'm swollen, dripping in sweat and not convinced that our AC will keep me comfortable when labor finally begins.

I could stop right there and you could all send me an iced decaf coffee (extra cream, please) alongside a sympathy card for my swollen ankles, but that wouldn’t really explain why YOU need to get pregnant NOW, would it?

Don’t worry, I’ll explain. But first, a little background …

I conceived this sweet baby shortly before Christmas. Apparently, that’s a very popular time to conceive because 9 of the 10 most common birthdays fall in the month of September. My due date, September 8, means I’m an easy statistic. Christmas time conception equals September baby. It also means that my entire third trimester has been during the heat wave that is summer.

Do I not have a brain? What was I thinking?

Friends, stay way from your husband during the holidays. Or, at least ask Santa to sneak some condoms down the chimney.

I don’t know … maybe all us wives are aiming to give the gift of “actions speak louder than words.” Maybe we’re just cold in the winter months. Then turn up the heat instead of snuggling close for goodness' sake. Either way, holiday nookie means September baby and September baby means summer pregnancy.

And this is why you need to get pregnant now. As in, like, yesterday.

Look at your calendar or period tracking app and highlight your next fertile days. Then, do the deed. You could even text your partner right now that baby-making days are a comin’ right around the corner.

It all comes down to simple math. (Or, the handy dandy due date calculators you can so easily Google.) Generally speaking, if you conceive during the first week of September, you’ll give birth in late May. If your fertile days are pushed a bit farther out and you conceive in mid-September, you’ll still find yourself with a June due date. Giving birth in late May or early June means you will avoid quite a few massively hot, sticky, sweat-in-places-I- don't-even-want-to-mention days.

And that's a gift as sweet as your new addition.

Now, a little side note, I 100 percent understand that it’s not necessarily easy to “get pregnant now.” Conception is a miracle, no matter when it happens. End of story.

If it takes spending your third trimester in the summer heat to bring a beautiful baby into your arms, do it. You will forget the suffering. Your ankles won’t stay swollen forever. You can figure out how to pay the astronomical air conditioning bill later. You will survive.

But, from a mom of four (three of which have taken me through the summer heat), a non-summer pregnancy is practically a miracle too—right there next to the miracle of conception.

If you’ve got baby on the brain, take it from me, it’s definitely worth ditching the birth control and trying for that little one when fertility next strikes. The sooner, the better.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

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