Once the decision is made to start trying, I feel like we must
reach the end goal or it may never happen. I fear delaying for too long.
Perhaps it is an irrational fear, but let’s face it—I’m not getting any
I feel my biological clock ticking with a (mostly) self-imposed
need to get pregnant again before I turn 35. With my 34th birthday just around
the corner, the tick-tock is getting
louder in my ears. Yet, we recently considered delaying trying to conceive.
I hate the “can we afford another baby?” question, but we needed to consider how expanding our family right now impacts our budget and debt-free goals.
This summer we took a hard look at our financial situation and
decided to focus on becoming debt-free. It was a big decision for us that led
to significantly changing our spending habits. It felt great as we knocked out
the first couple of debts on our list, but, of course, baby talk required us to
have another money talk.
I hate the “can we afford another baby?” question, but we needed
to consider how expanding our family right now impacts our budget and debt-free
goals. We aren’t struggling, but becoming debt-free takes time. More time than
I want to wait before having another baby. It’s a goal we can still achieve;
it’ll just take longer to get there.
However, we’re facing some work stability concerns right now
and that is scary to me. While the cost of a third baby would be minimal for us
(we practically have everything we need), there’s the uncertainty of replacing
lost income. How long would it take? Could we do it with me continuing to work
from home or would I have to look outside the home? What would childcare look
I started to feel nervous. It’s one thing to already be
pregnant or have a newborn while facing a life change, but another to actively
try to conceive a baby through it. That’s when the doubts crept in and I
started questioning if we should postpone our attempts or not.
Instead of postponing, I moved forward on one of my passions.
Last month I attended a training to become a postpartum doula and will begin
working towards my certification. It’s exciting and I can’t wait to get started
on my new venture, yet it’s scary to have so many changes going on at once.
We decided that it’s nearly impossible to plan the perfect time
to have a baby. There’s always a bit of uncertainty, but we know that somehow
it will all work out. I was laid off during my maternity leave after having my
first baby and we figured it out. We could get pregnant this month—or maybe in
six months, despite our efforts. So many things can change between now and the
eventual big fat positive pregnancy test. So many things can change between
conception and birth. Life changes constantly which is why we’ll continue
trying for now rather than regret waiting.