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Daylight Saving Time: A Survival Guide

Good morning! And yes, it is no longer morning but it feels like morning. Every day this week has felt like morning. Perhaps that's because we're all mourning that extra hour of sleep.

And while I love me some late-afternoon light, I do not love trying to get kids ready for bed when it's still light outside because it makes very little sense to them and also to me. Not only that, the extra light is a temptress to children who want nothing more than to run around barefoot in jasmine that happens to be blooming like a mofo all over this piece.

And I can't blame them because the evenings have been gorgeous. And the evening light has been beyond.

So, without further ado, here is my survival guide. Feel free to print it out, share it with friends.

Six Ways to Survive Daylight Saving Time

1. Spring forward even MORE.

After two terrible mornings, one of which I literally fell asleep trying to wake Revi and Bo (perhaps that has something to do with the fact that I was trying to wake them while under Bo's covers with my eyes closed), I decided to take matters into my own (hour) hands and pushed every clock in the house forward by 11 minutes. (Even numbers make me feel uncomfortable. 7:00 a.m. alarm? Gross. 7:02, you guys. 7:02.)

Anyway, all of our clocks are fast. So if you want to know what time it is, please don't ask me. (Ever since I pushed the clocks up 11 minutes, we have been ON TIME EVERYWHERE. SERIOUSLY. THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE. IT IS LIFE CHANGING. GO AHEAD! CONTROL+APPLE+P. I'LL WAIT.)

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2. Everyone must sleep in their clothes.

I have gotten shit for this in the past but I'm about to get all Bret Easton Ellis on that action because I couldn't care less than zero. Because having kids wear their clothes to bed IS MY LIFELINE. And, yes. I am sure that there are people out there who can get four kids dressed, fed and out the door every single morning with time to spare, but that is not the case for this girl.

Three out of three of my daughters must deliberate on their clothes du jour and that takes anywhere from three seconds to, well, we've had days where I've had to buckle Bo into her carseat in nothing but sneakers and Elsa undies, only to dress her later, in the backseat of the car. Not ideal. But I have learned not to negotiate with three-rorists. Not at 8:01 a.m., anyway.

3. Including me.

Now that I work at home with little to no adult interaction, I don't even bother to wear anything that isn't workout clothes on most days. Which is fine because Hal and I are doing Radius bootcamp every night together and it's seriously the worst/the best. (NOTHING SAYS ROMANCE LIKE A COUPLE OF OLDIES DOING SQUATS TOGETHER IN THE LIVING ROOM AT 10 P.M.)

Also, I know you're not supposed to exercise before bed but MAN, does it put my ass to sleep. No insomnia for this girl. My 1:00 a.m. bedtime is totally midnight, now.

4. Be optimistic!

Sure, you were 30 minutes late to school, but according to YOUR BODY TIME you were 30 minutes early! SEE!? It's just life, you guys. It's just life.

And speaking of which ...

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5. Late can be great.

People who are late are my people. I gravitate toward late people with a vengeance and am happy to say that the majority of my friends are also late people. And you know what? We are the least judgmental group I know. Everyone is invited to our group so long as you aren't a Judgey Judgerstein and love thy sister no matter her ish.

All sinners welcome. Inquire within.

ED: This doesn't really have anything to do with daylight saving time other than the fact that many people I know are struggling with timeliness this week. And I just want to say to all of you fine folks, I'm with you. And it's OK. Being late is not the end of the world in most cases. (I'm always relieved when people are late to meet me places. I feel like I can be late with them, you know? I feel like I'm free to be me.)

6. Caffeinate.

My mom posted an excellent cardamom coffee recipe this week on GGC. That was no coincidence.

What about you guys? On a scale from 1-10, how did you guys do this week? Me? I'm going to give us a 6 for timeliness and a 9 for effort. Averages out to a 7.5.

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