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We got some Chinese take-out last week, and my fortune cookie said, "Work on improving your exercise routine." What kind of horrible fortune is that? I want a message of hope and happiness in my future, not something that makes me feel guilty for having that extra helping of lo mein.
After I got done smashing that cookie into smithereens with my Tsingtao, I thought of some fortunes that I—and other parents—wouldn't mind getting in our next cookie.