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You've Gotta Laugh to Keep From Crying: Terrible Two Horror Stories

Photograph by Twenty20

Oh boy, the Terrible Twos. We are knee-deep in them right now with our little guy. I love him to pieces, but man is he all sorts of crazy lately! If you’re in the same boat, I’m thinking you’d like to know that you aren’t alone, am I right? So I asked moms to share their best (worst?) Terrible Two horror story, so we can all commiserate with one another. Strength in numbers, they say.

“I don't know if I can handle another round. Our little mister currently likes to push his sister down every time she stands up. No wonder she won't get the hang of walking, she's too traumatized.”- Caitlin M.

“We had company for dinner. I put my son in his high chair with his food, and he screams, 'No! I want crackers!' I told him he couldn’t have crackers, and he screamed again, 'I want crackers!' I told him he could have crackers or go to his room, to which he replied with more screams and proceeded to throw his dinner plate across the room. The company was more than impressed, I’m sure.” – Dorothy M.

“How about 'losing' your 2-year-old at home? Having to call the police, have a helicopter sent out, only to find him hiding in your bed, thinking he was playing a game. Worst moment. Ever.” – Samantha J.

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“I put my toddler in the car seat, closed the door and when I tried to open my door, he had the car keys in his hands! Little Houdini. I had to call 911 to open the car because he had thrown the keys onto the floor.” – Joanne G.

“We have been to the Ear Nose and Throat doctor multiple times in two weeks to remove rocks from our baby girl’s nose. It is traumatic for her while they put a scope through her nose and her throat, and yet she continues to stick rocks in there...” – Kimberly G.

It's insane. And it drives me insane. We're all crazy in our house for the next year I guess.

“He won't go in the toilet, but we have to watch him because he likes to distribute poop from his diaper throughout the house.” – Heather E.

“My 2-year-old started telling himself to 'Wake up!' when he started to fall asleep for his nap. He then started crying about it. Fell asleep, woke up and asked for ice cream, cried, and fell back asleep. Can be super happy one minute and then a monster the next. Love him to pieces, though.” – Laura G.

“My son is in the midst of the terrible twos and I don't think I'll make it through a full year of it at this rate. He says no to everything! Even if it's something he wants—something he just asked for. He will then say no and refuse it just because he likes saying no more than having what he actually wants! It's insane. And it drives me insane. We're all crazy in our house for the next year I guess.” – Rachel A.

RELATED: Nothing Can Help You Survive the Terrible Twos. Nothing.

“I went to a friend’s house and immediately upon walking up the driveway, my son just started whining and then full-on crying. This lasted the entire time we were there. We somehow stayed an hour, with tears the entire time. It was draining to say the least. Thank God for understanding mom friends that don't let tantrums phase them in the least!” – Katie R.

“My 2-year-old screams for cookies all the time! I try to draw her away and find something to put her mind elsewhere. Every time I go into the kitchen she follows me and screams her head off until I pick her up and sit her on top of the counters, then she will point to the cupboard and shout 'Cookies!' and cry!” – Erin F.

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