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Why Nina Garcia Says She Was a Good Mom ... Before She Had Kids

“I was such a good mom before I had kids.” –All Moms

We make so many vows before we have kids: "I will not have the child who throws tantrums in the middle of the grocery store. I will not feed my kids sugar. I will not bribe my kids to get them to behave. I will not scream at them. I will not talk about parenting techniques during cocktail parties. I will still go to the gym every day, wear makeup every day, and wear my highest heels every day. I will be the cool mom AND the supermom."

Then, one fine day, our beautiful babies are born.

After I had my first son, Lucas, I began to have what I call “real mom moments,” when everything I thought I knew about motherhood went out the window. With each passing “real mom moment,” I realized that every vow I had made when I was pregnant had to be rewritten. Then, they had to be rewritten again when I had my second son, Alexander.

This is the reality of motherhood. Nothing is set in stone, and we have to adapt. We must learn to laugh at how idealistic and naive we once were, and sometimes we have to share our old and new vows with fellow mothers, which I will do below.

Old vow: I will not feed my kids sugar.

New vow: I will not feed my kids sugar five times a day.

Old vow: I will not be the one talking about parenting techniques at cocktail parties.

New vow: If I find out you have a kid, I will be talking parenting techniques with you.

Old vow: I will not have the kid who screams bloody murder on a red-eye flight.


Old vow: My kids will not watch TV.

New vow: My kids will not watch TV unless it is educational or I have a headache.

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Old vow: I will work out at the gym every day.

New vow: Pushing a double stroller through Central Park counts.

Old vow: I will not allow my perfectly decorated home to be overrun by toys.

New vow: OK, let’s just keep the toys out of my bedroom and bathroom.

Old vow: I will not spoil my kids with things like iPads.

New vow: I will give each of my kids an iPad, but only for use on planes, trains and when I’m on a deadline.

Old vow: I will not bribe my kids to get them to behave.

New vow: HA!

Old vow: I will not be like my mother.

New vow: What would my mother do?

Please share some of your old and new vows in the comments section! It is important to let each other know that it is OK to be a real mom instead of a supermom or cool mom. In fact, I believe it’s better.

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